Prologue to Dextromethorphan

A DXM trip is something that can be a very personal experience to the user in special ways. For me, it was my first drug, even before weed. The following are notes prior to my first dex trip. At the time I was 18 and attending college. I was also a very paranoid, depressed individual with no job, no car, and no money. DXM has changed my personality for the better. I had no drug experience and I had not researched drugs for recreational use before.
Note: Text written in [brackets] are side notes added at the time of compiling this blog entry.

Monday, February 9, 2009

After many months of wanting to try weed or shrooms, I’ve decided to try DXM (Robitussin). I’ve looked up quite a few links and experience stories to inform myself on the drug. At this point I believe I’ll take 4 oz. of OTC Tussin and it will give me a first plateau high. 

[I was wrong at that time, its actually a second plateau, I miscalculated.]

My two best friends, A and T have agreed to try it with me. A was into it from the moment I asked but T was like “What the fuck, lol?” but she’s also now comfortable with it now.

I am not very nervous about it, more excited. We are trying to plan for it to be over Spring Break. It will probably be at my house in my room since I think we will be most comfortable there. Or at least, I won’t freak out, since I’d be the most likely to get a bad trip from my subconscious paranoia.

We can’t have a trip sitter since there is no one else available that we trust. The only person I think would be ok to be a sitter would be someone who is across the country.

[Silly me, thinking that a second plat needed a trip sitter... Where did I get this idea??]

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Well, T and I got in a little misunderstanding this morning and I don’t think she wants to try DXM now... Maybe I’ll just test it this weekend by myself, I really don't fucking know. I don’t even have enough money to buy a bottle.

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

T changed her mind, and is into it, now. She says that she needs a trip as bad as A and me. I read that it might give some temporary suicidal feelings. This made me consider having a trip sitter. But, as stated before, we don’t really have any options at the moment, which sucks. I’m pretty sure we are okay though. We won’t be going that high and it usually only happens at the high 2^nd-low 3^rd plateaus, we’ll be at low 2^nd.

A guy from one of my classes told me that DXM is a “rough one to start on.”

Thursday, February 19, 2009

 Change of plans – Gonna be safe and do a 1^st plateau for the first time. I just want a trip that will bring happy feelings.

[We all have to start somewhere, right? Eventually I learned.]

Monday, February 23, 2009

If there was ever a time I needed to dex it would be now. This entire month has been a damn roller coaster of bullshit. Last night I was supposed to be with W. [W was the guy I was hooking up with at the time.] Of course he never showed up, never texted/called to say he couldn’t come… Nothing. How very typical. This, on top of everything going on with my family and the fact that I'm literally a social outcast in my small college is really piling up on me. I feel so unimportant. I just want to let go and be free of this world. I just want to feel okay for a few hours. Just make it go away.

[I do not condone drug-use as a way to heal depression or self-esteem issues. In fact, its one of the worst things you can do, especially if you are weak minded or easily influenced. I'm lucky that it helped me instead of hurt me]

Friday, February 27, 2009

Two days ago I bought a 4 oz bottle of Robitussin Cough.

I just took nearly 3 oz, which will give me a high 1^st plateau feeling. The time is 9:05 p.m., by 10 p.m. I should be coming up.

I wrote down some reassuring things in case the trip gets difficult.

I can’t believe I’m actually doing this, lol.